Happy Halloween!

Yep, They'll Do That

Riding the bus, looking out the window.

Felix: Daddy, I spotted one dog at the dog park giving another dog a piggyback ride!

orchard and petting zoo

Just your usual Monday conversation

Felix: Daddy, today Roshni spit at me and I said, "Roshni! You shall have your vengeance!"

*****

Keir: Cosmo, do you like painting or drawing with crayons better?
Cosmo: Um...monsters.
Keir: You like monsters better than painting or drawing with crayons?
Cosmo: Yeth! They say "bah" to me.

Pumpkins, Apples, and the Horns of Dilemma

Rock star at the pumpkin patch.

A budding locavore. (We went to an apple orchard in Indiana last Sunday.)

Yesterday, we went to a Halloween festival at the park. (Photos to come.) Cosmo rode a pony, and both kids petted goats, sheep, pigs, and various fowl at the petting zoo. Later we talked about which kinds of animals have horns.

Cosmo: Animals don't have horns! Cars have horns!
Keir: (Aghast at his city slicker son's city slicking ways.)
Cosmo: I was just kidding!

Catching up

I feel bad that we don't quote Cosmo much yet. He says a lot of things, and often gets ahead of himself as he tries to express technical details of train wheels or recounts exciting adventures such as going to Evanston or the apple orchard. Let's just say that his sweet shaky voice and sly humor has us giggling all the time. Any day now he'll become more quotable, but in the meantime, here are some Felix quotes that have been piling up:

F, while looking at Snow White Viewmaster reels: If I was queen I would say "magic mirror on the wall, what is Miss Corbett doing right now?"

Felix sometimes gets leg aches at night, recently so bad that he was crying, but the subject started to change:
F: I will not want to eat breakfast tomorrow because my leg will hurt too much.
M: But you have to eat breakfast every day.
F: But I don't like to eat breakfast.
M: Last week you loved eating buttered bagel on the white curb before school. You just gobbled it up.
F, sobbing again: And it sparkled in the sunshine.
M: What sparkled in the sunshine?
F: The buttered bagel.

Felix went through a phase recently of hurling a new threat at Keir or me each time we would make him mad. Here is a list that we were keeping, each said with as much anger as he could muster:
I throw guns at you.
I'll put mustard on top of you.
I'll lock you in a cage.
I throw frozen fire on you.
I'll crush your bones.
I'm giving you a time out.
I'm going to cover you with strawberry jam and popcorn seasoning.
I'm going to squirt orange juice in your eye next week.

F: I can't pull my pants up by myself. Can I get some help around here?

F: There are three things that I'm really good at doing: trains, beading, and burping.
Yes, Felix has learned to burp on command.

Apples and Cookies

We went apple picking yesterday. Apple picking in Chicagoland usually involves crowds, lines, and frequent cash payouts. ("You want a BAG for those apples, mister? That's extra!") Our friends parked in the remote lot and we waited for a shuttle to take us to the orchard. (Yes, you read that right.) As we got off the shuttle, a yellow schoolbus, Felix bade farewell to the driver.

F: So long, Cookie!

*****

(The rest of this post is a bunch of scribbles of varying vintage.)

*****

I don't remember what he was throwing, but you'll get the gist.

K: Felix, you can't throw that around. It's too heavy.
F: This time, don't watch.

*****

Poetry in his soul.

F: (Drawing.) Daddy, this is a picture of a very, very old building that is falling down, like a dying apple tree.

*****

Homer and Bart.

K: Oh no!
F: (alarmed) Daddy, what happened!
K: It says in the paper that they're not going to sell beer on Metra trains anymore.
F: You like to drink beer, don't you, daddy?
K: Yes, I do like to drink beer.
F: Well, you just can't drink it all the time, because when you go on the Metra train, they won't sell it anymore.
K: Nope.
F: What can we do to make them sell it again?

*****

Felix overhears Marya and I talking politics while reading the paper.

F: Daddy, what happened?
K: Oh, our governor isn't doing a very good job.
F: Why not?
K: Well, he doesn't make very good choices.
F: I wish he would make better choices.
K: Sometimes people try their best, and they don't know they're not making good choices.
F: I'll teach him to make good choices.

*****

Explaining to Felix that I'm a little late because there was heavy traffic.

F: You should get home earlier, like between 5:17 and 5:20.

*****

Tucking in.

K: Can I get a goodnight hug, Felix?
F: I was thinking maybe I could do that tomorrow night.

*****

A loud bang.

K: Felix, what happened?
F: I was trying to get off my seat and my brain told me to kick the table. My brain's making bad choices today.

*****

A slightly older one.

F: Daddy, what is that?
K: That's a picture of Barack Obama giving a speech to a bunch of people in Germany. He wants to be President of the United States. We're going to have an election soon and everybody's going to vote for the person that they want to be President. The President is kind of like the boss of the country.
F: Yes, you can't be President until you're 17 years old.
K: Actually, you can't be President until you're 35 years old. But you can vote for the President when you're 18 years old.
F: Well, I don't want to vote when I am 18. I just want to be President when I am 35. I choose to be President of the whole United States and Africa, Australia, and Antarctica.

*****

Watching the Cubs get ready to break our hearts.

K: Felix, do you like soccer better, or baseball?
F: I like baseball better.
K: Why is that?
F: I like baseball because there's that funny commercial they put on there.

Bosmiam

F: Harun [friend at school] taught me how to speak Bosmiam.
M: Bosnian?
F: Yes, Bosmian.
M: What can you say in Bosnian?
F: Um, I forgot. But I speak three languages: English, Spanish, and Bosmian.

Another day recently, Felix was in a giggly mood. I said something funny and he said with a big smile "Get out of town, you silly woman."

Weights and Measures and Poop

Felix is interested in weights and measures. At the playground, after soccer on Saturday:

K: Felix, are you ready to go home?
F: No. I still have 44 pounds of energy left.

After dinner last week:

K: Are you done eating?
F: No. I'm only 9 centimeters full. When I'm 27 centimeters full, then I'll be done.

Cosmo loves singing. He has a lusty voice and a creative way with lyrics:

C: Take me out to the ballpoop
Take me out with the crowd
Buy me some peanuts and crackerpoop....

And:

C: When the dog toots
When the bee poops
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so poop!

Marya's favorite line, however, is this one:

Wild geese that fly with poop on their wings

Of course, we wouldn't dream of encouraging him by laughing.

recent photos

After "coal mining" at the playground.

I'm Scared

Recently, a few minutes after putting the kids to bed Felix (desperate, crying) called out for me. I went into their room to calm him.

F: Mommy, I'm scared.

M: What are you scared of?

F: Um, let me think about what I'm scared of.

F: Oh, I know what I'm scared of! I'm scared of the AutoChef [breakfast-preparing robot which explodes, from Wallace and Grommet cartoon].

Montana

You Don't Say

We have really been remiss in posting. Will try to catch up soon. For starters, an interesting aside from Felix the other night.

Felix: Daddy, I have something to tell you. Did you hear about the person who was peeing and they laughed and the toilet seat slammed down and the pee came out their nose?! It took 184 weeks to come out, and it turned into a FLOWER.

(The last bit said with a huge smile. This anecdote has its origins in cautionary tales about sneezing while you're eating, but I can't tell how how pee and the flower got into it.)

Live from Kiwanis Park

We'll put up some photos of our wonderful Montana trip soon. But for the moment, feast your eyes and ears on "Super Nana" performed live in Kiwanis Park by the Salt Lake City players.

Weekend in St. Louis

Kane County Fair

The Bad Guys are Dead

Minutes after putting the kids to bed tonight Felix began crying, so I went in to see what was wrong. Cosmo was fast asleep but Felix said "There was a loud sound, like a gun shot. But it wasn't a gun shot because there is no such thing as bad guys; they are all dead."

Cosmo's First Joke

How could I have missed this? Found a scrap of paper from several weeks ago (at least) where I scribbled Cosmo's first joke:

Cosmo: Knock, knock.

Keir: Who's there?

Cosmo: Techno pants!

Guess you had to be there.

(Or maybe you need to watch Wallace and Gromit in The Wrong Trousers.)

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Or this gem? This is representative of Felix's interest in numbers and counting. At bedtime, while I was singing "Hobo's Lullaby," Felix was whispering throughout. A bit miffed, I stopped singing and asked him what he was whispering about.

Felix: Daddy, I was just counting out the seconds in "Hobo's Lullaby." I thought there were 35 but there were 68.

I Hope None of These Are Recycled

The scraps of dialogue are piling up....

*****

Tonight, during a thunderstorm.

Felix: Oh! Oh! I saw lightning, my happy daddy! Daddy, I love you, but I just saw lightning.

*****

On the roof, we see some birds swooping around us. Felix is interested in bringing them home to our apartment. Some discussion follows about the difference between wild birds and domestic birds. I explain that, even if the birds wanted to come home with us, we can't have birds because cats like to eat birds. Felix thinks that's really bad of them.

Keir: Well, we like to eat birds, too. We eat chicken.

Felix ponders the logistics of this.

F: Do we just put the chicken in the oven and cook it for a long time until it's chicken?

*****

K: Felix, do you remember what "recycle" means?

F: Yes. That means, "Throwing it in the garbage."

*****

Felix is very interested in directions, N, S, E, & W, and sometimes even the positions in between. He says things like, "Look, Daddy, there is a sprinkler to the north!"

*****

Everyone's a critic.

F: Sesame Street is quite not the favorite. Let's watch Curious George.

*****

Cosmo is talking, too, and talking, and talking, and talking. Over the past month he's had a real explosion of speech and is using lots of complete sentences. They're not quite as quirky as Felix's. He says thinks like:

C: Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me!

Marya: I see you, Cosmo.

C: Mommy, look at me! Mommy, look at me! etc. etc.

Also, "I do dat." "I do it." "I do it all myself."

After engaging in a particularly messy or loud or ornery bit of mischief, he gives an angelic smile and says, "It's funny!"

He'll hide under a blanket or sheet and say, "Where are me?"

More examples coming soon. Frankly, both of them talk so constantly that it's a challenge to get anything down on paper....

Felix's Birthday Picnic